Let's Talk About Sex
by BadgerInMySoup
Summary: Kurt Hummel is the kind of guy who always has a plan, may it be for his outfit choices, shopping trips or even food intake. So, it's no surprise that he would have a plan the first time he and Blaine decide to have sex.


AN- Shout out to Lauren who's musings gave me the idea for this fic. All eager fans of Rocky Friendship, never fear, the sequel will be up within the next couple of days. Just look for the title: Of Being Gay and Falling in Love.

There is no smut here; sorry to burst bubbles. Hope you like anyway!

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><p>Kurt Hummel considers himself to be a very meticulous person. No matter what the occasion, he always has a plan. Saturday shopping with Mercedes? He brings color coordinated maps of the mall, highlighting the stores that most likely would have deals, the stores they shop at the most, and the stores that are closest to any sort of snack area.<p>

Clothing? He spends the Sunday night of every week planning out his outfits for the next seven days, going as far as to hang them in the closet together. Foods? He keeps a detailed food pyramid on the fridge (held up by a Ninja Turtle magnet) so he can be sure to get the right nutrients for the day.

So, of course the first time he has sex would have to be extremely, carefully and strictly planned.

"Kurt, are you sure about this?" Blaine asks. "I mean, sex is a big deal and I know how you feel about it. We've only been dating for a few months."

Kurt smiles over the rim of his coffee cup. "I am very sure. I want to have sex with you, Blaine. I just want to make sure everything goes right."

Blaine sits back in his chair. When he brought Kurt for coffee, he hadn't expected to be having a sex talk. At all. In any way, shape, or form.

So, of course he was surprised when the first thing his very skittish about intercourse boyfriend said to him as they sat down was, "So, I was thinking we should have sex."

"Kurt, babe, you know I'm fine with waiting. As long as it takes until you're ready."

Kurt smile softly. "I know. But, I am ready. I promise."

Blaine allows a grin to form on his face. "So. We're going to have sex?"

"We are. Your job will be to pick up the necessary items. I'll take care of everything else."

"What-what do you mean by everything else."

"Well," Kurt whips out his iPhone, "I was thinking we could do it this Saturday. My dad and Carole are going out of town for the weekend and I can easily get Finn out of the house. I think eight would be the most romantic time, dark out but not too dark and less chance of interruptions. Plus, the mood candles would look much better."

Blaine stares.

"What?" Kurt asks innocently.

Blaine shakes his head and takes a sip of coffee.

* * *

><p>Kurt manages to bribe Finn to stay at Puck's for the night with the promise of many homemade cookies and the dishes being washed and garbage taken out for the next month. He spends the week getting everything they would need and nervously counting down the days.<p>

That Saturday, he says goodbye to his dad and Carole at three, makes dinner for Finn and kicks him out around five. Takes a shower at six, begins sitting up at seven and is ready for Blaine to arrive at 7:50.

At 7:59, the doorbell rings and Kurt scurries to get it, beaming at his boyfriend as the door swings open.

"Hey," Blaine's smile isn't as wide as usual.

"Hey," Kurt whispers, suddenly flushing.

Blaine walks in and kisses Kurt softly, like he usually does. Kurt closes the door and turns to face his boyfriend, wringing his hands awkwardly.

"Er, shall we go up to my room?"

Blaine nods. "Sounds like a plan."

There's some fancy footwork as Kurt tries to move around Blaine and Blaine tries to move out of Kurt's way and finally Kurt grabs Blaine's shoulders and walks around him, turning Blaine as he goes. Then he grabs his boyfriend's hand and leads him upstairs.

The shades are drawn in his room and there are candles all over the place; on his vanity table, desk, a couple on the floor. He even managed to get rose petals and scatter them in a pathway to the bed. The radio is on, soft mood music flowing through the room.

Kurt bites his lip. "Uh, it's not too much right?"

"No, no," Blaine assures, wrapping his arms around Kurt's waist and pulling the taller boy into his chest. "It's perfect."

He nibbles the soft skin of Kurt's neck and his boyfriend happily arches his head to ease the task. Blaine reaches around and begins to unbutton Kurt's shirt.

"Should-should we move this to the bed?" Kurt asks breathlessly.

"Sure."

Blaine grips Kurt's hips and begins to walk the two of them to the bed. He turns Kurt around and kisses him quickly before gently pushing him onto the mattress. They continue to kiss and Kurt tugs at the hem of Blaine's shirt. The shorter boy sits up and helps Kurt pull it off his body.

It gets stuck; somehow, Blaine can only get one arm out of the shirt and the other is trapped inside. Kurt tugs at the fabric until Blaine moves his hands away and untangles himself.

They both chuckle a little and Kurt takes in the sight of shirtless Blaine. It's not the first time he's seen this, but it's definitely the most intimate.

Blaine leans in to kiss him and pushes Kurt's own shirt off his shoulders. His doesn't get stuck, thankfully, and then it's Blaine's turn to admire.

"You're gorgeous," he whispers into Kurt's ear.

Kurt blushes. "So are you."

Blaine leans in again but Kurt suddenly pulls back.

"Er, did we decide the…mechanics?"

"What?"

"You know. Who's going to…"

"Oh!" Blaine flushes. "Right. Uh, we didn't. Did you wanna, I mean, I'm not sure-"

"If you want to, you can, I'm not very partial. I mean, you know I don't really-"

"Yeah, right. Uh, we could flip a coin for it?"

Kurt stares at him. "Really?"

"Yeah. Heads it's me, tails it's you."

"And you just happen to have a coin on you?"

"I-oh. Right. Wallet is in jacket pocket. Downstairs."

"You know, forget it," Kurt says. "We can always cross that bridge when the time comes."

Blaine smiles. "Right. Let's get back to this part."

When he leans in again, Kurt doesn't pull away. This kiss involves tongue and a little bit of moaning on both sides. Kurt boldly runs his hands down Blaine's chest and the shorter boy's hands fall to Kurt's belt, unlatching it.

Wait. No, no he doesn't. Kurt breaks the kiss to glare at the impending article of clothing as Blaine furrows his brow and continues to tug on the buckle, willing it to come undone.

"I got this," Kurt says impatiently.

Blaine chuckles and sits back, watching as Kurt takes over the task. And coming up with the same problem.

"This is weird," Kurt muses as he struggles, "This belt has never given me a problem."

Blaine stops him. "Kurt…maybe this is a sign."

"What?"

"I didn't want to say anything earlier because I know how you are with your plans and everything but…"

"But?" Kurt prompts.

"But maybe we're moving too fast. This doesn't feel right."

His boyfriend tilts his head in a so-so fashion. "Yeah, it really doesn't. I didn't want to say anything because you seemed to be into it."

"So _you_ didn't want to say anything," Blaine says, "And _I_ didn't want to say anything."

Kurt laughs. "We would have had a really awkward first time all because neither of us had the guts to say anything."

Blaine kisses his forehead. "Kurt, we have plenty of time to have sex, okay? I'm perfectly comfortable with how our relationship is going."

"Me too," the taller boy admits softly.

Blaine climbs off him and hits the lights as Kurt begins blowing out all the candles in his room. Blaine turns the TV on as Kurt shuts the radio off and they both collapse onto the bed and snuggle close to one another.

"I'll see if I can find something on TV," Blaine suggests.

They channel surf until they land on an older episode of the Office. It's the one where Dwight has brought up all his old complaints against Jim and all the pranks his coworker has pulled on him throughout the years. Each prank is given a little insight from Jim's talking head.

Kurt and Blaine are in stitches.

"I can't believe that he actually got Dwight to hit himself in the head with a phone!" Kurt exclaims.

"That might be my favorite prank," Blaine says. "Either that or the time he dressed up as Dwight."

"He so cute," Kurt muses. "Jim, I mean."

"Oh?" Blaine raises an eyebrow. "Does someone have a little crush?"

Kurt rolls his eyes. "Yes, I am totally hot for Jim. You caught me."

Blaine laughs. "You would have a thing for the lead guy."

"That's that supposed to mean?" Kurt inquires playfully glaring at him.

"Well, you liked me; lead of the Warblers. You liked Finn, lead of the school. And you liked Sam…lead of the…blondes?"

"Nice try," Kurt says, leaning in and kissing him. "But a fail."

"Ok, Sam doesn't fit. But you like Jim."

"I do not! He's funny but I'm not like obsessed with him or anything."

"Oh, I think you are."

"I'm not."

"You are. And I know the exact way to get you to spill the beans."

"Blaine," Kurt's eyes narrow in suspicion. "What are you doing?"

Blaine grins. Then he launches himself at Kurt and begins tickling him.

"Ah! B-blaine. Stop. S-top that, oh, God, stop. I'll hit you, I swear it. Blaine!"

Kurt wiggles trying to get away and Blaine continues, ticking his boyfriend mercilessly. When he finally stops, Kurt leans back, catching his breath. Blaine hovers over him.

"Ready to admit it yet?"

"You suck."

Then, suddenly, the mood changes. Blaine takes in just how close he is to Kurt's face and Kurt realizes that Blaine's body completely covers his own. Suddenly, there's heat between them and Kurt notices Blaine's eyes have darkened a little.

So, when he leans up to kiss Blaine, his boyfriend eagerly kisses back.

And when he tries to pull Blaine's shirt off, there are no problems. And Kurt's belt undoes without any trouble. They don't decide who does what and there are no candles. The only sound is the ending credits to the Office and their own whispered names and hushed groans.

When it's over, they lay next to each other, sweaty and drowsy. Kurt catches Blaine's eye and smiles.

"Wow."

Blaine chuckles. "I think that should be my line."

They kiss softly and Kurt rolls over to his side, tugging on Blaine's arm until his boyfriend is chest-to-back with him. He feels Blaine nuzzle his neck and sighs contently.

"That did not go according to plan," Blaine reminds him quietly.

"I know. Maybe plans are a bit over rated," Kurt replies sleepily.

The last things Kurt hears before he goes to sleep are the quiet chuckle of Blaine, some annoying infomercial, offering pillow pets for only $9.99, and three words, whispered softly into the room.

"I love you."

* * *

><p>AN- These two are adorable.<p> 


End file.
